the fuzzy future of a worry wart

so i awoke this morning in the cold house a little distraught.  austin has been on my mind a lot as of late, but the fear of unemployment has been more of a burden in my thoughts.  as i have mentioned before, i have been painting this wonderful picture of my future, living unemployed in austin with him.  the time is getting nearer so i'm thinking about it more and more, getting more anxious with each passing day.  i know he is a sweetheart, he is kind and caring, a little shy.  since i don't know him fully, or at all really, i must imagine what else he might be like.  you know, the kind that will make sure others are happy before he his, a bit of a hard ass when it comes to work, if you piss him off (mainly the ppl he works with) he will eventually snap and will definitely laugh at you when you fail because he believes in karma (that last part is actually true, sorry drummer boy), the person who will offer whatever he can to ensure your well being.  ok, now with that last one being said, i can tell you that part might be fully true.  he did offer me his apartment to stay at, i suggested only while i was looking for a place of my own, he was talking full time.  that's wonderful, he's only there half the time with his job and it'll cut back his rent once i find a job, and will be fairly cheap comparatively with rent in austin for me; we'll go 50/50, it'll be great, right?  haha, no.  so i have come to realize that he has offered his place to many others as well, and not just anyone, the female kind.  um, ok, i know i haven't been there all summer, but we have talked about it at various points throughout.  and we discussed it a few days ago again.  and yet i still find all the girls posting on his facebook about "oh, hey, i'm coming to austin, can't wait to see you" "i'll be at the show, we should hang out" "hey, i'm moving to austin, you might get a new roomie".  what. the. hell?!  i know i'm jumping to conclusions here, but seriously?  you tell me time and time again that "you've been waiting for me to get back" "you haven't been with anyone" "you don't share well with others".  yeah, well things are nearly the same way with me buddy boy!  i was waiting too.  yes i flirted (ok, a lot) but i didn't get with anyone until i started seeing these messages for chics (and you even told me yourself that you have looked but never touched, honey i know you work for a band, you've seen more tits at shows than at a friggen strip club!!).  and i sure as hell don't share well with others!  aahhhh!!!  soon i will find out the truth.  i can't just bombard him with text messages asking him about all these girls, but i will mention it to him when i see him.  not for a while still though.  and if all else fails, i guess i'll have to move back to dallas in with my parents at the age of 24.  f.m.l.  i need a new career path.